Self-conquest

Ah! What a beautiful word and what a beautiful thing! To become little by little our own masters, no longer to be tugged by a bundle of feelings which drags us along and leaves us disordered as by a panic. No, to know where we are going; to recognize the fact that it is not fun, but not to stop because of that; to accustom our reason to making decisions and our will to accomplishing the decisions of our reason; and to accustom our will to move only in the wake of the will of God; that is what is worthy of our status as children of our Heavenly Father, as disciples of the Resurrected One, of Him who has conquered death, who is triumphant and who was not found in the tomb, who will never be found there, because He is life. ~from Joy Out Of Sorrow, by Mother Marie des Douleurs

The beauty of self-conquest is well worth the arduous climb up and over the mountain of my ego. It's an ongoing adventure with unexpected twists and turns, various pitfalls, and inevitable delays. Only when I reach the top can I see on the other side the green pastures and still waters for which I ardently long -- and the descent to reach them is no easy slide, either. Yet this is a happy journey I gladly continue anew each day as I strive to grow in self-conquest so that Christ may be magnified in me. "For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain" (Phil 1:19). When I remember St. Catherine of Siena's declaration that "All the way to Heaven is Heaven, for He said, 'I am the Way,'" my heart exults and my steps quicken. "The lot marked out for me is my delight" (Ps 16:6). It is enough that I know where I am going, and for whom and with whom I travel. My Lord has prepared for me a lovely dwelling place, where I shall live with Him forever. Goodness and mercy follow me even now as I go from strength to strength. Yes, today and always, "my heart and flesh sing for joy to the living God!" (Ps 84:2) Amen! Alleluia!