An Evening with the Holy Father

Ave Maria!  On the evening of June 2, almost half a million people attended the "Celebration of Witnesses” at Bresso Park in Milan, Italy, one of events of the seventh World Meeting of Families. Pope Benedict XVI arrived at 8.30 p.m. to participate in the celebration, during which he answered questions put to him by various families on subjects which included the economic crisis, the position of divorced people in the Church and the indissolubility of Marriage. The Holy Father also recalled his own infancy and family life. 

The Vatican has published the entire transcript of these questions and answers here.  The exchange that spoke most to my heart was initiated by a couple from Madagascar, Fara and Serge, who have been engaged for four years.  They have been studying in Florence and will return to their country as soon as they graduate to marry and to help their people.  They told the Holy Father that they feel that they were made for one another, and that is why they want to marry and build their future together. They said that they also want every aspect of their lives to be shaped by Gospel values.  Then Fara added, "But speaking of marriage, Your Holiness, there is a phrase that attracts us more than anything else, and yet it also frightens us: 'for ever'".

Pope Benedict XVI, after thanking them for their testimony, responded in part:

"...we see that falling in love is a wonderful thing, but perhaps it does not always last for ever: it is a feeling which does not remain indefinitely. So it is clear that the progression from falling in love to engagement and then to marriage requires a number of decisions, interior experiences. As I said, this loving sentiment is a wonderful thing, but it has to be purified, it has to undergo a process of discernment, that is, reason and will have to come into it. Reason, sentiment and will have to come together. In the Rite of Marriage, the Church does not say: 'Are you in love?' but 'Do you wish?' 'Have you decided?' In other words, falling in love has to become true love by involving the will and the reason in a deeper journey of purification which is the journey of engagement, such that the whole person, with all his or her faculties, with the discernment of reason and strength of will, says: 'Yes, this is my life'. I often think of the wedding-feast of Cana. The first wine is very fine: this is falling in love. But it does not last until the end: a second wine has to come later, it has to ferment and grow, to mature. The definitive love that can truly become this 'second wine' is more wonderful still, it is better than the first wine. And this is what we must seek. Here it is important that the 'I' and the 'you' are not alone, but that the parish community is also involved, the Church, the circle of friends. All this – the right degree of personal maturity, communion of life with others, with families who support one another – is very important, and only in this way, through this involvement of the community, friends, the Church, the faith, God himself, can a wine emerge that will last for ever. I wish you well!"

What beautiful yet challenging words of wisdom from our Holy Father!   And what a powerful image he uses in referring to the first wine -- i.e., falling in love -- and then the second wine -- i.e., fermenting, growing and maturing.  The first wine, excellent though it is, will and must in time be surpassed by the second, greater wine. And, as the Holy Father astutely points outs, this does not happen in isolation, not ever, no more than a single grape can produce a wine that will last and slake the thirst of many. Only through involvement "of the community, friends, the Church, the faith, God himself" can purification, growth and maturity take place, and then we will, thanks be to God, be lead out of ourselves into the "communion of life with others". 

All this is true for all of us, whether we are married, widowed, single or consecrated.  Each one of us must grow and mature, our love and our faith must be purified until we together reach that unity of faith and knowledge of the Son of God that St. Paul wrote about to the community at Ephesus,"to the extent of the full stature of Christ, so that we may no longer be infants, tossed by waves and swept along by every wind of teaching arising from human trickery, from their cunning in the interests of deceitful scheming. Rather, living the truth in love, we should grow in every way into him who is the head, Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, with the proper functioning of each part, brings about the body’s growth and builds itself up in love" (Eph 4:13-16). 

In Eucharistic Prayer II of the Third Edition of the Roman Missal, the celebrant of the Mass asks our Lord to remember His Church spread throughout the world and to "bring her to the fullness of charity." Let us make this prayer our own, today and every day, and let us work diligently and ardently to make it a reality for ourselves and for each other.  Fiat! Amen!